If you want to know me, listen to my songs.
Everything from well-informed, accurate--if shallow--faith back in '04:
Jesus, sacrifice
You were slain to pay the price
That should have been required of me.
Jesus, God's own Son
You're the perfect righteous One
All of Heaven bows before Thee.
Thine was the terror, and Thine the shame
Now Thine is the name above all other names
Son of God what can I say to You?
There is nothing worthy I can do
I can only stand in awe
At mercy deeper than my fall
I have no ground on which to stand,
Except upon Your nail-pierced hands.
To deep frustration at the course and nature of my life a year or so later:
And I don't understand why You made me this way
And I don't understand who I am
And I don't understand why You fill up my hand
Till every thing overflows and slips away
Slips away...
And I don't know why You've given me
So much more than I can hold
And I don't know why You keep hitting me
As I keep getting old
And I don't know why time slips away
And nothing seems to change
And I don't know how You love me just the same
Just the same...
Yet always (95% of the time) remaining in the generally happy state of my blessed life:
Building Legos, model cars
Talkin' 'bout the War of Stars,
All the ways we whiled away the time for all those years
Quoting movies, no one knew
What we meant but me and you
The humor just went right over their heads
You go a-long with what's going on
You've never been somewhere that wasn't better for you being there..
How good and how pleasant it can be
When brothers dwell in unity!
Your time at home is coming to an end
I'll miss you, my brother and my friend.
And still remaining relatively light-hearted, positive, and strange :-)
Take a cup and fill it slowly now,
Pour it with care.
Empty out the can completely now,
Nothing left in there.
Take a sip and sip it slowly now,
Savor your fare.
Open up a Dr.Pepper and happiness is there.
Then God blew into my life like a hurricane for 2 months:
Don't doubt! Trust in what you know He says
Just step out! Step out on His promises
He'll meet you - look at all the lives around!
Just trust Him. Trust Him with your life.
But I settled back into the same old valley, slowly settling deeper and deeper:
If I say I'm sorry
Will I mean it this time?
I can swear to leave it
But I'm staying behind
How can You save me if I don't want to be saved?
How can You hear me if I don't mean what I pray?
How can You love me when I've thrown it all away?
Am I lost
If I don't mean what I pray?
And always, ever, never getting away from knowing I should be doing more with my life, but not doing it, and not knowing how to:
Look at all the pathways that I could take in life
Traveling the world or marrying a wife
Staying close to home, or moving far away
Anything I wanna do is possible, they say
But I put on my boots and go to work and live another day
In the same old car, the same old smile, and the same old aimless way
If I could just see where to throw myself, I'd give it all away
But I put on my boots, and go to work, and live another day
All the comforts of home that you love
All the potential that you're dreaming of
All could be yours, or all could be naught..
But time passes by and you've only got one shot
All the songs I write and all the instruments I play
But I put on my boots, and go to work, and live another day.
So will this win out in the end? Or will the words of "On My Side" prevail?
Time after time
Time after time lookin' out the door
Time after time
Time after time what's He waiting for?
What's He waiting for?
But You were always on my si - de
You were always on my si - de
I couldn't tame You I couldn't blame You
I couldn't tame You I couldn't blame You
I couldn't trace You, I couldn't chase away Your plans for me
Monday, February 23, 2009
Three from the Sea
Three.
I see three.
Three I see.
Three I see--that's three for me.
Three for me and that's all I see.
But wait - there's more!
Do I see four??
Could there be four for me?
Four I see;
That's more than three;
But still that's not
a lot
for me.
This poem is an ode to my Shrimp flavor "Cup o' Noodles," and the dried sea critters therein.
And a tip of the hat to Dr. Seuss and Ogden Nash :-)
I see three.
Three I see.
Three I see--that's three for me.
Three for me and that's all I see.
But wait - there's more!
Do I see four??
Could there be four for me?
Four I see;
That's more than three;
But still that's not
a lot
for me.
This poem is an ode to my Shrimp flavor "Cup o' Noodles," and the dried sea critters therein.
And a tip of the hat to Dr. Seuss and Ogden Nash :-)
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
Doings Lately
Time for an update, so all is not lost to the vistant magues of time.
This past weekend was one of my precious "long" weekends - from getting off day shift Thursday at 6pm to starting night shift Monday at 6pm. I had been planning for awhile to go to a Mae show at Messiah Saturday night, but I decided not to, which was nice 'cause I got to be here for Mom's birthday (also Saturday).
Thursday at work ended lousily, and I didn't get to basketball till about 7:15pm. 45 minutes of bump-and-bash basketball was not at all satisfactory.
Friday I slept most of the morning away, and did some errands in the afternoon. Landed some SWEET work shirts and T-shirts at the thrift store. That evening Mom and Dad and I went out for a nice dinner, which was a Christmas present this year. We were going to go to Kaya at the Strip, but they were reservation only (Hmm. It does happen to be Friday night before Valentine's Day :-/). We ended up at Kiku - Pittsburgh's first sushi place. So good! The first time I've had octopus sashimi that was actually good.
Saturday was a nice, pleasant day in Mom's honor. We had coffee and cinnamon rolls in the morning, and I made tortilla pizzas for lunch. There was a Pitt basketball game at 4, and Daniel and Kyle got here about 6pm. We had steaks for dinner, and then sat around the family room watching the Penguins and giving Mom presents. Kyle and I stayed up and watched a little TV after everybody hit the sack, but I got pretty tired, and actually went to bed at midnight!
Sunday we had church at the Upper Saint Clair High School, due to an unavoidable using of Independence Middle School for that one Sunday of the year. I wasn't needed on tech team, so I got a full night's sleep, which was cool. There wasn't much going on after church, so I headed home and we had Wal-Mart pizza (so incredibly good!). It took some mad texting and a couple phone calls, but I finally ironed out plans for that evening. It was my night to stay up late in preparation for night shift, so I enlisted the help of Shannon and Debs, fellow night owls, so pass the time away. They came here, and then we all trekked to the Grahams' house up on Mt. Washington. Which by the way I loved. We went down to Station Square with Andrew, but there wasn't much going on there, and it was pretty cold. Definitely have to come back when it's warm and lively. Then it was all into Pepsi Blue and off down the freshly-snowed streets to Pitt, to meet up with Thomas at Fuel 'n' Fuddle. One delicious pizza and one AMAZING celtic red ale later, it was back home for some chillin', and then off our separate ways. A good night. Nice to have some snow again - I miss the whiteness when it's gone.
So that was the weekend. Nothing earth-shaking, but I think it was valuable to be with Mom on her birthday, and it was nice to see Daniel and not miss church.
One other cool thing from the weekend: I finally cracked the puzzle of how to record College Song! It's a chill, fun, Dispatch-ish song about just moving in to college, and every attempt I've made to record it has been wrong. Too sterile.. the groove is destroyed.. it doesn't fit. Well, stick your most basic mic ever (Shure SM-57) in front of you, and play guitar and sing into it at the same time. Then stick the same mic over by the guitar amp and lay down electric and bass. Then swing it back over and stick it under bongos. Bam. There you go! Yay! That's my true love in recording: Simple, natural, REAL, clever, rule-breaking, full of life and dynamics and richness. If only I had a good-sounding room to use!
Yesterday... was Tuesday. Monday, however, was cool 'cause Debs came over around 2 to watch the Pen's away game against the Islanders. I made tortilla pizzas and espressos, which were delish, but were a poor salve to the wound of our loss to the only team below us in our division :-( Arg Pens! Come on! It was also a bummer to pack up and leave at 5 when people were coming for the Pitt game that night. Ah well. I enjoyed watching the box score on my computer at work and seeing the numbers stack up for Blair and Young as Pitt stayed ahead and soundly beat #1 UConn. Woo HOO, baby!
Today I slept till 3, evaporated some time in texting and talking with Mom, and then lifted weights downstairs, which felt GREAT! I'll pay for it the next 2 days, but you gotta start somewhere. I've been creeped out by how comparatively weak I've gotten, and that ain't gonna change unless I get down there and start buffeting. Now I'm enjoying my white chocolate mocha, absorbed in the white bright world of this computer screen since Mom's got all the lights off 'cause of her migraine. I've got my nice isolating earphones in and Kraftwerk is filling my head with their beautiful, mechanical, seminal electronica. Looking ahead, Nate Dogg is coming over tonight to play bass, I might try to hit a Maxi-Saver movie, tomorrow looks like Strip District, maybe Marley and Me with Mom, and basketball in the evening. Then working nights all weekend and MISSING OUT ON JUSTIN BEING HERE! :-( :-( Hopefully we can hang out a bit Saturday afternoon. Oy. I need to meet with Mr. Pierson asap about youth camp workload distributions, and 2 weekends after this one looks like the first yickie pickie 2009 meeting, which will get youth camp stuff rolling in earnest. I also want to start the final recording of College Song (the one I was talking about was just a scratchpad recording). Hopefully I can keep the vibes of it alive. Recording by yourself is a tricky, psychological, frustrating and delicate process. Unless you were a long-experienced, well-practiced musician, which I am not.
I think I'll sign off for now. More has gone on further back than this past weekend, but I care not to extend further this post, which is already more than what I planned, and less concise than I might wish. Peace. I hope.
This past weekend was one of my precious "long" weekends - from getting off day shift Thursday at 6pm to starting night shift Monday at 6pm. I had been planning for awhile to go to a Mae show at Messiah Saturday night, but I decided not to, which was nice 'cause I got to be here for Mom's birthday (also Saturday).
Thursday at work ended lousily, and I didn't get to basketball till about 7:15pm. 45 minutes of bump-and-bash basketball was not at all satisfactory.
Friday I slept most of the morning away, and did some errands in the afternoon. Landed some SWEET work shirts and T-shirts at the thrift store. That evening Mom and Dad and I went out for a nice dinner, which was a Christmas present this year. We were going to go to Kaya at the Strip, but they were reservation only (Hmm. It does happen to be Friday night before Valentine's Day :-/). We ended up at Kiku - Pittsburgh's first sushi place. So good! The first time I've had octopus sashimi that was actually good.
Saturday was a nice, pleasant day in Mom's honor. We had coffee and cinnamon rolls in the morning, and I made tortilla pizzas for lunch. There was a Pitt basketball game at 4, and Daniel and Kyle got here about 6pm. We had steaks for dinner, and then sat around the family room watching the Penguins and giving Mom presents. Kyle and I stayed up and watched a little TV after everybody hit the sack, but I got pretty tired, and actually went to bed at midnight!
Sunday we had church at the Upper Saint Clair High School, due to an unavoidable using of Independence Middle School for that one Sunday of the year. I wasn't needed on tech team, so I got a full night's sleep, which was cool. There wasn't much going on after church, so I headed home and we had Wal-Mart pizza (so incredibly good!). It took some mad texting and a couple phone calls, but I finally ironed out plans for that evening. It was my night to stay up late in preparation for night shift, so I enlisted the help of Shannon and Debs, fellow night owls, so pass the time away. They came here, and then we all trekked to the Grahams' house up on Mt. Washington. Which by the way I loved. We went down to Station Square with Andrew, but there wasn't much going on there, and it was pretty cold. Definitely have to come back when it's warm and lively. Then it was all into Pepsi Blue and off down the freshly-snowed streets to Pitt, to meet up with Thomas at Fuel 'n' Fuddle. One delicious pizza and one AMAZING celtic red ale later, it was back home for some chillin', and then off our separate ways. A good night. Nice to have some snow again - I miss the whiteness when it's gone.
So that was the weekend. Nothing earth-shaking, but I think it was valuable to be with Mom on her birthday, and it was nice to see Daniel and not miss church.
One other cool thing from the weekend: I finally cracked the puzzle of how to record College Song! It's a chill, fun, Dispatch-ish song about just moving in to college, and every attempt I've made to record it has been wrong. Too sterile.. the groove is destroyed.. it doesn't fit. Well, stick your most basic mic ever (Shure SM-57) in front of you, and play guitar and sing into it at the same time. Then stick the same mic over by the guitar amp and lay down electric and bass. Then swing it back over and stick it under bongos. Bam. There you go! Yay! That's my true love in recording: Simple, natural, REAL, clever, rule-breaking, full of life and dynamics and richness. If only I had a good-sounding room to use!
Yesterday... was Tuesday. Monday, however, was cool 'cause Debs came over around 2 to watch the Pen's away game against the Islanders. I made tortilla pizzas and espressos, which were delish, but were a poor salve to the wound of our loss to the only team below us in our division :-( Arg Pens! Come on! It was also a bummer to pack up and leave at 5 when people were coming for the Pitt game that night. Ah well. I enjoyed watching the box score on my computer at work and seeing the numbers stack up for Blair and Young as Pitt stayed ahead and soundly beat #1 UConn. Woo HOO, baby!
Today I slept till 3, evaporated some time in texting and talking with Mom, and then lifted weights downstairs, which felt GREAT! I'll pay for it the next 2 days, but you gotta start somewhere. I've been creeped out by how comparatively weak I've gotten, and that ain't gonna change unless I get down there and start buffeting. Now I'm enjoying my white chocolate mocha, absorbed in the white bright world of this computer screen since Mom's got all the lights off 'cause of her migraine. I've got my nice isolating earphones in and Kraftwerk is filling my head with their beautiful, mechanical, seminal electronica. Looking ahead, Nate Dogg is coming over tonight to play bass, I might try to hit a Maxi-Saver movie, tomorrow looks like Strip District, maybe Marley and Me with Mom, and basketball in the evening. Then working nights all weekend and MISSING OUT ON JUSTIN BEING HERE! :-( :-( Hopefully we can hang out a bit Saturday afternoon. Oy. I need to meet with Mr. Pierson asap about youth camp workload distributions, and 2 weekends after this one looks like the first yickie pickie 2009 meeting, which will get youth camp stuff rolling in earnest. I also want to start the final recording of College Song (the one I was talking about was just a scratchpad recording). Hopefully I can keep the vibes of it alive. Recording by yourself is a tricky, psychological, frustrating and delicate process. Unless you were a long-experienced, well-practiced musician, which I am not.
I think I'll sign off for now. More has gone on further back than this past weekend, but I care not to extend further this post, which is already more than what I planned, and less concise than I might wish. Peace. I hope.
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